I take it back

February 9th, 2006

I received the following email from my soon-to-be-ex-husband, Endicott:

From: Endicott
To: Flo
Date: Thu, 09 Feb 2006 18:14:32 -0500

Are you at home or office this Tuesday?

I thought, “Don’t you mean next Tuesday? I’m at home and the office every Tuesday.” I was about to type that into the reply window when I realized next Tuesday is Valentine’s Day…Yes, I am that slow.

It’s one thing to send me flowers on my birthday. I let the anniversary bouquet go without a fight, even though it was a sad reminder of what we lost. But a gift on Valentine’s Day is not okay. It’s so far from okay, that I am at a loss for words over the fact that I actually have to explain to Endicott that this is not acceptable. Should I really have to explain this? Doesn’t everyone just instinctively know that it’s not okay to send your separated spouse a present on Valentine’s Day? If we ever ACTUALLY celebrated our love on that day, the present might almost be acceptable…No, I take it back — it will never again be acceptable to send me a Valentine’s Day gift.

So, yes, I was instantly annoyed by the email. It evaporated any goodwill I’ve felt towards Endicott recently (that lasted a record breaking six days), so I sent the following email response:

From: Flo
To: Endicott
Subject: don’t even THINK about it
Date: Fri, 10 Feb 2006 01:15:41 -0500

Don’t you dare!

He better not visit/call/send/order/inquire/f*cking think about making any gesture towards me on Valentine’s Day. If he does visit/call/send/order/inquire/f*cking even breathe in my general direction, bad things will happen…Do you hear me, Endicott?

Don’t even think about it, Jackass!
Flo